Voice

Voice

by Deleted user -
Number of replies: 2

Before: If Eve had never replaced Lilith in the canonical text, it is possible that women would be more outspoken following in the confident footsteps of Lilith instead of Eve’s footsteps, which are often portrayed as submissive. 

After: Eve is known as a submissive woman who follows the path men have shown her whereas Lilith is independent and follows her own path. Women might be more outspoken and confident if Lilith was their role model instead of Eve.

I'm not sure if the after is any better because voice is my biggest flaw when it comes to writing.

In reply to Deleted user

Re: Voice

by Maude Sutton -
You might try "Biblical scholars often portray Eve as a submissive woman..." (active voice). But then you'll need citations for that statement. Other than that I like the second sentence.
In reply to Deleted user

Re: Voice

by Deleted user -
I think possibly adding first person here could be helpful. You might try "We often see Eve as a submissive woman and Biblical scholars also often portray her as one"