22SP_SO205A-Sociology of the Family

I think it is much easier to see someone you do not know well in a positive light, ignorance is bliss. In contrast, it is easier to see someone you know very well in a negative light because you know all of their flaws and have the opportunity to have negative interactions with them. In my experience it is much more common for someone to see a parent they are distant from in a negative light. They view a distance parent as a failure, not someone who is mysterious and glorified to them. I do not think it is fair to say the more frequent contact has to result in a more negative or a more positive relationship, rather both at the same time. You can feel negatively about the way your mom does ______, but appreciate and feel positively about how she does _______. Rarely is it one or the other and never both.

In my opinion, relationships where there is frequent contact but can lead to negatively- viewed relationships and relationships where people do not see each other often but have a positively-viewed relationships, are based mostly on the types of connections and desire between the children and parents. Having relationships where you do not see or contact your parents often, however, still remaining to have a positive relationship with them can be hard, but depending on the connection and desire of the individuals from both sides it is possible to achieve. However, relationships where there is frequent contact, but negative relationships can be potentially due to a lack of connection or due to the constant nature of having each other present that it is taken for granted. The scenario where children and parents are not fond of each other but see other often is seen most frequently in my experience, most likely due to the likelihood that most of my friends parents were present in their lives, leading them to potentially take their relationship for granted and value it less than if they did not see each other often.

I think frequent contact with a family member allows for more arguments, disagreements, and invasion of personal time/privacy. While having frequent contact with a family member can be great, it can also be draining. Having to give so much time and attention to the same person or group of people could inevitably cause strain on those relationships. Whereas if you have less contact with someone it could foster a very healthy relationship with boundaries and allocated time together and apart. However as almost every topic we have discussed, its dependent on the situation and the people. Some people may thrive with often contact, where some people may have a negative relationship due to less contact. Personally, I have seen how having close contact and infrequent contact have affected my relationship with one specific person. Since I am a very independent individual, I find that less frequent contact improves our relationship.

Frequent contact with parents can have both positive and negative affects on a child depending on the health of the family relationship. If the family is loving and caring then frequent contact will absolutely come out as a positive reaction. However, as the child grows older the amount of contact needs to shift to give the child more independence due to the child having more freedom in their own lives. If the parents do not respect that then the relationship can get negative.

I think frequent contact is a gateway to arguments and unhappiness, because your always in someone's personal space and they feel that they can never breath and be themselves. An example of this is the idea of love sometimes. If you're with someone all the time and continue to see each other and this person is someone you like eventually by frequent contact you will love the person, even if that love isn't real. Thats why frequent contact can lead to a negatively viewed relationship because you build certain feelings about someone because your always around them and it's convenient, but the feelings most times aren't true after a while. Infrequent contact allows for personal space and creates a sense of loyalty and trust which makes times when you see someone better. This is due to time allowed to be by yourself and it allows people to really evaluate the relationships they are involved in. I think frequent contact can be positive overall if they relationship started off infrequent, but most marriages are frequent contact and those are usually positive overall due to compromise.

I feel frequent contact while a child is older could be seen as negative since the child would usually want dependence from their parents and could feel smothered. This is why infrequent contact can be seen as a positive for older children. My parents never smothered me or left me to be alone, so the relationships I have with them have stayed positive since I have the freedom to do what I want and have rules that I need to follow. For more frequent relationships, I think that it depends on the family's relationship. In other words, a more positive family relationship equals a better connection, while negative relationships equal a terrible connection.

Based on my relationship with my parents I see more of the frequent contact between children and their parents pointing to positive feelings about their relationship. I think there is a positive correlation between communication and positive relationships. The more you can share about your success and trials with your parents I believe that it will strengthen the relationship. I know that is not the case in ever child-parent relationship, but based on my experience that is how I view it. I think if parents and children want to talk and be in each other lives then more contact will have a positive relationship, but I also think if not every member wants to be in frequent communication it can feel like more of a burden which would cause a negative result.

I think that when it comes to frequent contact the child will probably get information of the family secrets etc meanwhile without frequent it is a limit to what is given/shared or not towards everyone in that relationship. I am not sure, because there are so many relationship with either a frequent or not frequent relationship and they work. not every relationship is perfect in reality.

I think that for both frequent and infrequent contact, it depends on the dynamic of the relationship and the situation. Based on my personal experience, I can see where either can be true. In certain situations, infrequent contact might be the best option for an optimal relationship with your parents. People who do not get along well with their parents even as adults may appreciate not talking to them as often because it will be less chance for arguments. People who are in contact with their parents frequently as adults may feel more burdened or smothered by them. But at the same time, sometimes more contact works better for some, and less contact may be problematic for others.

I believe that it is not the frequency of contact, but rather what happens during the time that people are together. For instance, many parents need their kids to help them in their old age. Although the adult children should help, it can be frustrating for them. Afterall, how fun is it to try and teach a senior how to use a computer? Interactions like these can cause stress and put strife in the relationship. Similarly, some elderly people are not financially stable. Their needs can put monetary strain on their family and may foster resentment. If people are in contact because they want to see each other, then they likely will have positive experiences. However, if they interact out of necessity, both parties will most likely view each other less positively.

I don't think frequent contact always leads to a negative relationship with parents. A lot of my friends have constant contact with their parents, and it seems to be beneficial to them. The reason this isn't a negative is because their parents are being supportive and just wanting to know how things are going. I think as you grow up, some people choose not to share everything with their parents, so little stressors and issues in their lives are not on each others radar. I think overall, i have seen friends with frequent contact with their parents have better relationships.

I think that frequent contact with family members can lead to negatively-viewed relationships because when you're with someone for long periods of time you're bound to get frustrated and annoyed with them and the fact that they are your family and you know they will always love you, can make you react a certain way towards them that you probably would not do to someone who is not a family member. Infrequent contact can lead to positively-viewed relationships because you are not with them a lot so you look forward to the time you are with them and get to catch up on everything. In my personal experience, it depends. I spent a lot of time with my nana growing up because she lived with my family and she took me to school and home from school everyday, so the little things started to annoy me so much. Our relationship was different than the typical grandmother / granddaughter relationship. On the other hand, my family spends a lot of time with my aunts, uncles and cousins because we live so close and I love our close relationship because I feel comfortable around them and they are like my second parents, which is nice. For me, if I spend a lot of time with someone or have a close relationship with them, that means I genuinely enjoy spending time with them and so that results in a positive relationship overall. Because I am an introvert and I love my alone time, when I find myself wanting to be with that person over being alone, I know it is something special and will result in a positive outcome.

I think that one of the reasons why more frequent contact could lead to a more strained relationship is because when you spend more time around someone, there is more time to have arguments or differences. Another reason could be the children could feel as if their parents are "helicopter parents" and that they can't do anything without their parents knowing because of how much contact they have. Infrequent contact could lead to a positive relationship because you don't have more opportunities for arguments. I think that around me, the friends that I have that are very close with their parents tend to get in small arguments with each other. These small arguments can bubble up and turn into large grudges.
I think it depends on the the people in a parenting situation with frequent contact. I think a good example is the TV show "Gilmore Girls". Rory is very close with her mom to the point where they are best friends. They get into small arguments all the time and sometimes hold grudges against each other. Though, at the end of the day they are still each others best friends.